Or: More Customer Service News
Worker Dies as Obama Voters Stampede Wal-Mart.
Death By Blitz Line "He was bum-rushed by 200 people," said Jimmy Overby, 43, a co-worker. "They took the doors off the hinges. He was trampled and killed in front of me. They took me down too...I literally had to fight people off my back."
The unidentified victim was rushed to an area hospital, where he was pronounced dead at 6:03 a.m., police said.
Sure I'm a big advocate of participating in the economy but sure, yeah, every one of us shares in the guilt of this bizarre death-by-donning-the-WalMart-smock. Uh huh. Even those of us who merely accept gifts purchased today. Just because it's Black Friday and it appears to be a black WalMart and just because we ain't obviously black and just because our genetic predisposition for shopping may be fixed, none of that excuses us for obsessive, fevered, heathen participation in the sad and sorry economic excesses of today -- and the season. Too bad rational -- to say nothing of spiritual -- reflection and interior readjustments and self-control and, yes, shame are passe in our world.
Wasn't just yesterday a national day of giving thanks?
Now, didja pick up any luv gifts for me today?
Gimme 'em here.
Do I really hafta wait for Xmas?
Wait. Nevermind. Nice pants. Thanks. Glad you shopped today.
And thanks for the sandwich.
Meanwhile, What The Fuck. Animals. Double Feature:
No Mouth To Mouth -- WalMart Stampede 2008
WalMart Stampede 2007
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