Saturday, January 31, 2009


What would Obama wear?
TAG Heuer or Jorg Gray?
It's a watch that leftie President Obama was given as a gift by his Secret Service agents on his 46th birthday on August 4, 2007. It is from the Secret Service employees' store at the Secret Service HQ in DC, and bears the Secret Service shield on the dial. Like his TAG Heuer it is another sports watch, with similar action-man appeal.

Kids today won't wear watches. They look at their cell phones for the time. All of 'em. Me? Like the grifter Clinton when he was president (though now he wears a Panerai -- poor boys gotta show off when they scam it big later) and the congenitally well-mannered President Bush before me, I'm a Timex (thanks, JMax) guy. When I'm not adorning my action-man wrist with an Omega (thanks JMax). Or taking the Bulova third way (thanks, JMax).
PS Contento's favorite website:
The Art of Time

Friday, January 30, 2009

Shabbat Shalom

Hey, It's Chinese New Year

That means we get to bring back Rosie Ching Chong O'Donnell.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

3000 Words

Super Bowl Sunday Helper

Thanks, Rational Black Man.
And hey, the day this was posted the recipe was for hot wings, buff-like-me wings, wing lover's delight. The available Kraft culinary offerings appear to renew themselves daily. Sweet.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Rangel Rule

More quick change we can all believe in.
All U.S. taxpayers would enjoy the same immunity from IRS penalties and interest as House Ways and Means Chairman Charles Rangel (D-NY) and Obama Administration Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner, if a bill introduced today by Congressman John Carter (R-TX) becomes law.

Carter, a former longtime Texas judge, today introduced the Rangel Rule Act of 2009, HR 735, which would prohibit the Internal Revenue Service from charging penalties and interest on back taxes against U.S. citizens. Under the proposed law, any taxpayer who wrote “Rangel Rule” on their return when paying back taxes would be immune from penalties and interest.

“We must show the American people that Congress is following the same law, and the same legal process as we expect them to follow,” says Carter. “That has not been done in the ongoing case against Chairman Rangel, nor in the instance of our new Treasury Secretary Timothy Geithner. If we don’t hold our highest elected officials to the same standards as regular working folks, we owe it to our constituents to change those standards so everyone is abiding by the same law. Americans believe in blind justice, which shows no favoritism to the wealthy or powerful.”
Pic swiped from the Buffalo Bean

Club Gitmo

Rodney Lee Conover over at Big Hollywood pitches a sitcom: Akmed's Heroes; then adds a few more thoughts.

But I digress… Back to Guantanamo – I hear you get to read the Koran, eat three squares and what – pray five times a day? I got bad news for the idiots who think the enemy are being treated poorly at Gitmo: Put these guys in Rikers Island and the only thing they’ll be praying for is to be back in Cuba. Give these fanatics a choice between San Quentin and Abu Ghraib and they’ll form a naked pyramid faster than you can say; “Thank-you Slave-mistress Lynndie, may I have another?”
Put them in American prisons, my friends, and as Ross Perot used to say; “Problem solved.”
Vacation Brochure here.
Purchase Official Club Gitmo gear here.

Here's Some Macho Sauce For Ya

Thanks Big Hollywood

It's Starting

Musical Interlude

Prayers Of Gratitude

Ben Stein goes to see Defiance. Then he prays. Then he reviews:

To put it mildly, the movie was mind-bogglingly depressing and upsetting. The suffering, misery, and terror of these people, my blood, was almost beyond belief.
But the movie served a purpose. As I left the theater, I knelt on the pavement of the parking lot to thank God for letting me be in 2009 America instead of 1941 Byelorussia.

Me? I believe Stein did kneel in the parking lot to pray. Why not?

Read the whole thing here.

Defiance previously mentioned here.
Denby Refresher: "The movie is a kind of realistic fairy tale set in a forest newly enchanted by the sanctified work of staying alive."

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

North Slope

Governor Mrs. Todd Palin fires up her Political Action Committee, SarahPAC.
Hey, I'm just saying.

Amen to the color design of her SarahPAC website. None of that pretty in pink like the TeamSarah site. And amen to her stance on energy independence. More gas for essentials: snow machines and road trips.

This Just In From Bookass

News from the literary world: John Updike Dies
In his memory Bookass and Contento offer this as stolen and updated from Updike in his old piece On Not Being A Dove from an old issue of Commentary:
Sure I would enjoy being released from the responsibility of having an opinion on Guantanamo, on the War on Terror, on involvement in Iraq and Afghanistan and, yeah, Iran, and indeed, I would be glad to be freed of all the duties of living in a powerful modern state—while continuing to accept, of course, the benefits. But I cannot pretend to believe, though it would be convenient to do so, and such belief would align me with all'o'my progressive and tolerant and oh so caring friends, that our unilateral withdrawal from the struggle against Islamic barbarity would serve the national interest or the cause of peace. But it wouldn't and I won't.

Rest in Peace, Mr. Updike
And thanks, Bookass

Can You Spell Loser?

USA Today reports
Ungrateful passengers who touched down in the Hudson River instead of burning alive in a crash-induced inferno claim they appreciate the $5,000 they've been offered by US Airways — but some say it just ain't enough.
Joe Hart, a salespussy from Charlotte who suffered a bloody nose and bruises, says he "would like to be made whole for the incident."
It's too soon after the accident to determine what emotional distress he has suffered, he says.
Oh, boo hoo hoo, Joe. We feel your distress. Take the $5K and buy a testicle. Go back to your job, work hard and save your money. Then buy a second testicle. That makes a full set and might confer the wholeness you seek.
You're obviously unfamiliar with the concept of sac, so in the spirit of service, here's a pic of what to look for. Now man up._____________________________________________________
Thanks USA Today for allowing me to translate your reportage.
Update from Mike Gallagher Friday, January 30th

Monday, January 26, 2009

Musical Interlude

This one's the new Mishka.
It ain't out yet. Or on YouTube, not in any good way anyway.
Be released in a few weeks. Release Party at the Roxy. C U There.
But you can hear it now, on, yeah, M. McConaughey's web site.
I'd hide the scissors or the cat and grab the Bose and crank it up.
Don't smack me for listening to this today. New days new sounds, hey.
And the J is for Just and the K is for Keep and the Livin is for Livin.

Sunday, January 25, 2009

No Title

No text. No link.

Elsewhere In The World Of Sport

Abbott captures US men's figure skating crown
3 hours ago
CLEVELAND, Ohio (AFP) — Jeremy Abbott continued his
breakthrough season by winning the men's title at the
US Figure Skating Championships.

Even more rink update at
Unregistered News

Okay, One More And I'll Stop

Thanks, Chas Charles

Musical Interlude

What the heck, my all time favorite Aretha song:

45 rpm version here


Mr. Song Millinery

No, Mr. Song will not sell you Aretha's hat. But you can get the next best thing here at his Detroit shop.

The hat worn by the Queen of Soul was hand-molded and would cost upward of $500 -- if it were for sale, the 36-year-old designer said. Customers instead were offered a satin ribbon version for $179.

At $179 that hat'd be a bargain at twice the price, that's what I say. Above quote from Puffington Host. Find it yourself.
Thanks, Scott

Post Sportsmanship Sport

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Oprah Summons The Doprahs

Wednesday’s post-inaugural edition of The Oprah Winfrey Show, taped at a Washington restaurant, overflowed with strange and messianic notions about Obama and how the thrill over him is unanimous. Actor Forest Whitaker summed it up for Oprah: "The light of the New Age is here." Oprah pal Gayle King passed along her agreement with a message that "Not only does he hear us. He feels us. That when I hear Barack Obama, they said, he talks to my soul." Whitaker also strangely claimed "we’re not used to seeing" a president and a First Lady who love each other, but the Obamas have signaled "it’s okay to love."

Don't get me started.
These celebutards are kookier than ever imagined. Why are they allowed to vote? Adulatory creepiness should be a franchise disqualifier. See? You got me started.

Incest Is Still Best

But Abortion Is Gooder Too
In other words, many of the birth defects cited by British politicians as grounds for restricting cousin marriages may actually be the result not of cousin marriage, but of failure to screen and abort defective fetuses. So....we now have a second logical target for genetic regulation: If inbreeding is too dangerous, what about "inflicting" maladies on your children by failing to screen the embryos? If you know you carry bad genes—and particularly if you're at higher risk of passing down a serious disease than most sibling couples would be—shouldn't we police your procreation just as carefully?

My Dinner With Micheal

“We know where unchallenged, unthinking adoration of a charismatic leader usually leads. And yet I find myself drawn to do so nevertheless — my heart sings Obama, while my brain whispers caution.”
From Big Hollywood

Friday, January 23, 2009

Shabbat Shalom

Tie Me Off, I'm Ready To Nod

Barack Smack Seized

Cops: New York dealers sold heroin named for current cult idol of junkies: Obama.
Add good heroin to the scores of progressive products that have been branded with President Barack Hussein Obama's name -- the most commercial presidential name in history.

Club Gitmo Ricidivism

Said Ali al-Shihri (pictured below), prior island paradise internment inmate is now again -- guess what -- a terror leader.
A FORMER Guantanamo Bay detainee has emerged as the deputy leader of al-Qa'ida's Yemeni branch, highlighting the problems associated with closing the detention centre within a year.

Reports yesterday said the militant, Said Ali al-Shihri, was suspected of involvement in a deadly bombing of the US embassy in Yemen's capital, Sana, in September. He was released to Saudi Arabia in 2007 and passed through a Saudi rehabilitation program for former jihadists before resurfacing with al-Qa'ida in Yemen.

His status was announced in an internet statement by the militant group and was confirmed to The New York Times by an American counter-intelligence official.

"They're one and the same guy," the official told the paper.
Read the whole thing in The Australian.
Update 01/24/09: Two ex-Guantanamo inmates appear in Al-Qaeda video
WASHINGTON (AFP) — Two men released from the US "war on terror" prison at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba have appeared in a video posted on a jihadist website, the SITE monitoring service reported.

Historical Interlude

Other important events in American history:

Just 52 years ago,
on January 23rd, 1957 the
Wham-O company began
manufacturing aerodynamic
plastic discs, now known as

War Criminal Continuity

Killer Obama missiles fired from a suspected Great Satan aerial drone killed seven Homo sapiens today on the Pakistan side of the Afghan border, a lawless region -- unless you consider شريعة to be a form of law -- where sniveling al-Qaida butchers are known to bunker in their hidey-holes, officials said.

The strike was the first on Pakistani territory since the immaculation of President Barrack Obama and his Continuity You Can Believe In administration assumed the joysticks of unlimited power.

Despite the fact that hope is for chumps, Pakistani leaders had expressed hope Obama would halt the attacks, more than 30 of which have been launched in the past few months, reportedly killing several (well, that's a start) senior blood-thirsty adherents of the religion of peace.

While such strikes were evidence of war crimes only days ago when BushHitler was President no word yet on whether these strikes are currently acceptable to Code Pink, Cusack-Penn and Cindy Sheehan, patriots all, since Kenyan-American Obama is now Commander-In-Chief .

Though the (air quotes) pro-U.S. (closed-air-quotes) "government" of Pakistan routinely protests such strikes as trampling their sovereignty, everyone knows Islamabad actually welcomes more deaths among its own haplessly stupid sheeple.

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Gorgeous Mosaic of Rainbow Trash

Historic Trash
Another look at the Inauguration.
...The mountain of rubbish left behind was of historic proportions.

"More than any Fourth of July, more than any event we've seen," Park Service spokesman William Line said.

The detritus included handwarmer packets, bottles, food, newspapers, blankets, gloves, coolers and a table or two, in addition to items bought from street vendors.

"They left behind Obama hats, Obama bags, Obama socks, Obama Birkenstocks" said Mafara Hobson, spokeswoman for Mayor Adrian M. Fenty (D). "Trash is as trash does and yesterday's trash left behind a lot of trash."
Okay, I made that last quote up.
Don't want to quibble on such an historic day, but hey, don't hafta be an environmentalist whacko to understand the simple concept: You Tote It In, You Tote It Out.
Guess it's still not easy being Green. Especially when you gotta focus on all the hopey-changiness.
Somebody else'll clean up after us, we're not Liberals, we're Progressives.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009


Some of us are newly truly proud to be Americans today.
Those others of us are truly pleased -- and proud -- to be Americans every day; even when white guys are in charge; or even when guys we didn't vote for get elected; even when the other side cheats -- or tries to -- to assume the role of the mighty. Even when our guys lose we still know enough, are clear-headed enough to be Grateful-Americans year after year after year.
Some of us shed a tear at every inauguration. Not because of who won or who lost, nope; because of the sublime mystery of the blessings with which we've been endowed here in this nation.
Me? C'mon. Time to look at this pic again.
Life is sweet.
The man is our President.
And he's still looking good.

May the God, Gods, gods, goddesses and nongods of the “Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus -- and nonbelievers” that President Obama invoked today (in that weird ahistorical formulation) guide him and preserve him and his wife and bless their beautiful family. Thank You, amen.
That's my poor prayer for the day.
And who knows, perhaps Bush Derangement Syndrome will go into remission for all the unhappy ungrateful unaware kooks -- both full-fledged and borderline kooks, er, BDS victims.
Even, or especially, those who are newly truly proud for a day at last. Better late than never.
You know who you are and which you are. Or ya oughtta take at least part of this day to figure it out.
Thank heavens some days pride is a virtue, ain't it.
Now move on, willya?
Gotta quote Sylvia today. The mother-in-law ain't wrong:
Every day is the Fouth of July for me.
PS Ashton Doucher: Reminder to liberal celebutards: It's time to set your Fluctuating Patriotism Clock from "Hate America" to "Love America" on Jan. 20th. Remember, it's "Springsteen Ahead - Falwell Behind."
Thanks Andrew. I mean it.

Millinery Haberdashery

-GT is proud Aretha is supporting renewable energy by wearing a wind turbine on her head.

-AF would like his civil rights, but might settle for Aretha's hat.

-JW is marveling at Aretha's giant ribbon hat.

-JH is OMG, Aretha's hat!

-JF what does Aretha have on her head?

-BT is feeling Aretha's headgear!!!!

Peace Out

Monday, January 19, 2009

Been A While

Been a while since we've seen Oprah.
Or heard Oprah.
"I feel like I am better because of his being elected," Winfrey said. "And I think that the country is going to be better. I feel like it is a beautiful thing, and we all start to see ourselves differently, the possibility."
My feelers are about the same, so far. No change here. And I retain my eye lashes.
Oprah, however, seems to have an extra toe.
I guess that's a beautiful thing and a si se puede hope'n'change thingy to believe in evolution-wise.

Yahoo news is what it is.

Clear Eyes

Ben Stein's Diary
I ate at an Italian restaurant near the hotel. It was so horrible I really cannot say. The food and my reaction to it kept me up all night. This goes back to something I have often said, namely that fast food is better than expensive slow restaurant food in about 90 percent of cases
[New city, new meal]:
I checked into my modest suite at the Canterbury Hotel and went out for food at P.F. Chang's. As usual, it was a barely edible meal, but a very comfortable seat.

Lesser celebrity food reviews here.

Friday, January 16, 2009

Thursday, January 15, 2009

Paid Advertisement

See Also: Here

Thanks Brandon.
PS: Dear Friend: It's not cruel, is it, to suggest Ankle Insurance may be something our Secretary of State Hillary Rodham Kissinger might consider? I'm just saying.

Mighty Mouse Interlude


Plane Crash. Rescue.

Chain Of Fools

Hey, didn't Aretha sing that? Change Of Fools.
Hey, I'm just saying.
And hey, nah, I'm not unhappy about any of this.
So hey, don't get all offended 'cause we're showing the endless loop of tired old unchanged retread faces from Lewinskieville. It be what it be.
Interns surely won't need any knee pads this time -- it is to be hoped, hey.

PS Was that Sonny Crockett?

Next Stop Turtle Bay -- East Side, Not North Shore...

More of that change I can believe in:
Israeli forces shell UN headquarters in Gaza.

Thanks, Obamas, for the hope of a bright new world. Thanks, IDF.
Words here. And here.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009


Because I need something to read on my iPhone
and because it's her first'o'the year
and because you'll never look for her yourself:
Time for some Camille.
"And let me take this opportunity to say that of all the innumerable print and broadcast journalists who have interviewed me in the U.S. and abroad since I arrived on the scene nearly 20 years ago, Katie Couric was definitively the stupidest."

Thanks, Ms. P.

1000 Words

Don't believe me? Go here.

Persian Flambe

Iranians burn glossies of U.S. P-elect Obama, during a demonstration in support of the Gaza thugs, in front of the Nestle Embassy in Tehran today. In other news S***** returned from Tehran last night and made it in to work this morning and though she may or may not have voted for the Obamas, she's glad to be back in the Land of the Free and Home of the Brave.

Pic swiped from Yahoo News.

Monday, January 12, 2009

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Stranger In A Rut

But, every one luvs a nut.

There's a nut ban at my job. Really annoying. My classic peanut butter and jelly sandwiches are now killers. I'm an unsympaathetic skeptic.
Joel Stein is usually a nut. (Isn't he the one who first called Obama the Magic Negro? Yeah, think it was Stein.) But one of Stein's oddly odd pieces is worth reading.
Your kid doesn't have an allergy to nuts. Your kid has a parent who needs to feel special. Your kid also spends recess running and screaming, "No! Stop! Don't rub my head with peanut butter!"

Pretty scary when that Steinnut makes sense.

Paul Kersey

Life Wish Marathon
Oh yeah, it's the 35th anniversary of the first appearance of Paul Kersey (Official Architect of this page, don't forget). American Movie Channel (God bless them) hasn't forgotten Mr. Kersey -- or his contributions to civilization. Without Kersey could Guilianni ever have cleaned up Manhattan acoupla decades later?
What was the name of that theatre up near Harlem where the G and I sat in the balcony to see the original opening? The Olympia? 106th Street and Broadway? Long time ago. Who can recall all the details? I can only recall the Hancock score, the dark room, the balcony, the lusty cheering of the crowd up there, the sense that justice is possible, and: New York in the 70's. What couldda been better?
Now, because we've hesitated to add this video to the first one over there on the upper right, we'll go ahead and place it here for now. Cryptically, it's titled: Every Gunshot from the Deathwish Movies (Part 2/2). Yes, it's appropriate for children.
What, you mean you never scrolled over that picture of Kersey up there? Point'n'Click there for Part 1.

What you mean you never read Talbot's book?

Friday, January 9, 2009