No pretender, he.
Born on February 22, 1732, in Westomorland County, Virginia, Wshington shaped this nation by leading our American forces during the fight against the British, by presiding over the writing of our Constitution, by serving as our first president.
H/T American Patriot's Almanac
Chuck Norris was the fourth wise man, who gave baby Jesus the gift of beard, which he carried with him until he died. The other three wise men were enraged by the preference that Jesus showed to Chuck's gift, and arranged to have him written out of the bible. All three died soon after of mysterious roundhouse-kick related injuries.
In It Together: At last, something worth reading in the LA Times